What's Going On...?
Apr. 13th, 2008 11:37 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
willow_25So here I am. In case anyone was wondering, still not dead (yay!).
I have this temp-to-perm job. It pays well, and it's in midtown, so it's a nice walk from Grand Central. I feel like I'm falling in love with the city again every morning as I walk along with the crowds.
The thing of it is, I want to stay there. It's not the job I wanted when I left DC on a mission to change careers and get myself financially stable. It accomplishes only the second of those things - not a career change at all. It's a change in term of moving from the legal industry to the financial industry, but it's the same type of job. Still, I want to stay, because I feel incredibly needed and appreciated. Which is a good feeling to have, especially after so many years working for Carol, who reduced me to tears and drove me to drink on a regular basis. The portion that makes me want to leave, is that one of the duties I really wanted (the meetings and parties), that was in the job description when I interviewed, has been given to someone else, and I'm not sure if I'll be able to get it back once I settle in.
I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to stay for two reasons: first, everyone is very tight-lipped about things that go on in the office, so I have no clear picture of what the process of hiring me permanantly entails. When I ask, I get answers like "You're doing fine" and "We like you" and "Don't worry about it". Which you'd think was reassuring, but it's not. I'd prefer to hear, "well, we like your work so far, but it'll take another two months of having you do increasingly more complicated things before we really decide, and then we run a very intense background and credit check which you might not pass, and if you don't we can't hire you no matter how much we want to". I suspect the last bit is closest to the truth, but no one will verify that. Second, I have two bosses, and I'm not sure one of them cares for me. Also, he runs around and does his own thing, and I feel like I'm flunking the 'pin him down and make him do stuff' portion of the position.
I think, since it's been 5 years since I temped anywhere, I am no longer used to it. It's a scary thing, not knowing if you'll be at the same office from one week to the next. I don't like the feeling.
One thing this job has taught me, though, is that I am perfectly qualified to manage a small office. One of the staffing agencies I've been working with kept trying to convince me, and my Mom agreed that I was perfectly suited to that kind of thing, but I didn't trust myself. Now I know that I could really do it. Which is a good thing to know, especially if I have to start interviewing again in a few weeks.
I haven't decided yet if I'm brave enough to get on LJ at work. By the time I commute from 6:30 am to 8:30 pm, when I get home at 9 I don't really feel like writing anything, so writing at work seems like a good way to keep up. I would bring the laptop with me and work on the train, but the laptop has become a very small desktop that doesn't work very well. Translation: it only works on a power cord, and even that is iffy at the moment.
I'll need to invest in a new computer sometime soon. Which is bad, because I'm also saving for a trip to Kansas City, MO with one of my friends (long story), a wedding in Philly in September, a trip to Foxwoods for the weekend when my brother comes home from Iraq on leave next month, and a car. Basically, a good chunk of what comes in every week right now goes directly into savings. And then there are all those bills I'm trying to pay off.
I think that's all the news that's fit to print. I hope to be around more now that I can (tentativly) focus on things other than the job hunt.
I have this temp-to-perm job. It pays well, and it's in midtown, so it's a nice walk from Grand Central. I feel like I'm falling in love with the city again every morning as I walk along with the crowds.
The thing of it is, I want to stay there. It's not the job I wanted when I left DC on a mission to change careers and get myself financially stable. It accomplishes only the second of those things - not a career change at all. It's a change in term of moving from the legal industry to the financial industry, but it's the same type of job. Still, I want to stay, because I feel incredibly needed and appreciated. Which is a good feeling to have, especially after so many years working for Carol, who reduced me to tears and drove me to drink on a regular basis. The portion that makes me want to leave, is that one of the duties I really wanted (the meetings and parties), that was in the job description when I interviewed, has been given to someone else, and I'm not sure if I'll be able to get it back once I settle in.
I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to stay for two reasons: first, everyone is very tight-lipped about things that go on in the office, so I have no clear picture of what the process of hiring me permanantly entails. When I ask, I get answers like "You're doing fine" and "We like you" and "Don't worry about it". Which you'd think was reassuring, but it's not. I'd prefer to hear, "well, we like your work so far, but it'll take another two months of having you do increasingly more complicated things before we really decide, and then we run a very intense background and credit check which you might not pass, and if you don't we can't hire you no matter how much we want to". I suspect the last bit is closest to the truth, but no one will verify that. Second, I have two bosses, and I'm not sure one of them cares for me. Also, he runs around and does his own thing, and I feel like I'm flunking the 'pin him down and make him do stuff' portion of the position.
I think, since it's been 5 years since I temped anywhere, I am no longer used to it. It's a scary thing, not knowing if you'll be at the same office from one week to the next. I don't like the feeling.
One thing this job has taught me, though, is that I am perfectly qualified to manage a small office. One of the staffing agencies I've been working with kept trying to convince me, and my Mom agreed that I was perfectly suited to that kind of thing, but I didn't trust myself. Now I know that I could really do it. Which is a good thing to know, especially if I have to start interviewing again in a few weeks.
I haven't decided yet if I'm brave enough to get on LJ at work. By the time I commute from 6:30 am to 8:30 pm, when I get home at 9 I don't really feel like writing anything, so writing at work seems like a good way to keep up. I would bring the laptop with me and work on the train, but the laptop has become a very small desktop that doesn't work very well. Translation: it only works on a power cord, and even that is iffy at the moment.
I'll need to invest in a new computer sometime soon. Which is bad, because I'm also saving for a trip to Kansas City, MO with one of my friends (long story), a wedding in Philly in September, a trip to Foxwoods for the weekend when my brother comes home from Iraq on leave next month, and a car. Basically, a good chunk of what comes in every week right now goes directly into savings. And then there are all those bills I'm trying to pay off.
I think that's all the news that's fit to print. I hope to be around more now that I can (tentativly) focus on things other than the job hunt.
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no subject
Date: 2008-04-13 06:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-04-13 07:32 pm (UTC)I would probably lean in the direction of staying there, but then I tend to follow the natural law of staying in motion in one direction unless acted upon; good luck in making your decision.
no subject
Date: 2008-04-14 06:01 pm (UTC)Hooray re: the job. At least you seem happy, which is a good thing.